I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
