i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Randomize
