East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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