I like my sex mixed with concussions.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
