we're blogging at a bar
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize
