false alarm. still invincible.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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