I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
