I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
