this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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