its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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