one might say we're banned from that church
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
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