im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize