...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Randomize
