i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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