This girl is more easily done than said...
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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