Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
