Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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