You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
