she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
she smelled like a LAN party
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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