sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
