we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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