he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
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