like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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