...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
