I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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