do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
