butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
