I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
