I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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