Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Randomize
