I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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