Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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