How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
