It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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