i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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