Your tits are I can't wait for
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
