you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize
