I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
