thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
