Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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