Whod you bang
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize
