Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
