Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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