just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
