What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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