i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
