hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
The beer is more important than you right now.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Randomize
