It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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