he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
