Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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